For conservatives, 'Merry Christmas' becomes a cause

These &*@!ers are really getting annoying. There's no phrase I hate more right now than "traditional values." I'm glad you people have values. Values are wonderful guideposts to help you live your lives. You know what? I have values. BILLIONS OF OTHER PEOPLE HAVE VALUES GOING BACK JUST AS LONG IF NOT LONGER THAN YOURS. That doesn't make them any less "traditional" than yours.

How about if I start bemoaning the split from my ancestor's traditional values of sacrificing oxen to Zeus, huh? Gosh, we haven't bashed anyone over the head with a rock and left him in a peat bog so the crops will grow lately, this world's really gone downhill.

Last time I checked, Jesus preached peace and tolerance for everyone, not just "your kind." Look into your heart and ask, does it really, REALLY ruin your day if a store sign doesn't say Merry Christmas? If it does, you have bigger problems than I can comment on.